There's a gravity to this year. Gravity in its solemnity, but also in its weight, in its heaviness. In the significance of current events, in the feeling that our actions and lack thereof are defining history.
We moved to Minneapolis in May. At the time, it was a unique experience. Shops were closed with COVID lockdowns, and many online retailers were out of stock, or experiencing significant shipping delays, so our apartment remained unfurnished for weeks. We welcomed the new city, our first place together, with a mattress on the floor.
We joked at the time that we had installed a bidet before a bed frame, because who knew when the next toilet paper shortage would come. You remember that phase, right? The novelty of it? The "can't wait to tell my grandkids about.."?
Well if May 2020 in Minneapolis is ringing any bells for you, you're quite right- the story picks up at pace from there. George Floyd was murdered on May 25, 2020 by the Minneapolis Police. Video was released the next day of the officer kneeling on George's neck for over 8 minutes, until he asphixiated and died. Protests erupted to demand justice, and quickly spread to over 2,000 cities and towns in over 60 countries.
Within Minneapolis, opportunists siezed upon peaceful protests in the daytime to loot and burn at night. Our neighborhood shut down, and we went under curfew. Buildings boarded up, private security guards were hired, and the national guard came through with tanks. Our summer sunsets on the balcony transitioned from cheering for #healthcareheroes to now looking out to see which direction the crowds would flow that evening, where the helicopters were circling, and how many police and guardsman were on patrol.
While I was walking one evening, I began to see people running towards me. Not en masse, but in twos and threes, quickly climbing onto bikes and into cars, speeding away. Not people running towards a cause, but fleeing in fear. I remember hearing, "I was on the bridge when the truck came". A tanker had plowed through a crowd of protestors on a Minneapolis bridge, threatening their lives.
That was traumatic, at the time. But there have been over 100 such incidents at Black Lives Matters protests since. Over 100 times where a human has driven into protestors, threatening their lives, in 2020 alone.
The deterioration of our country, of our respect for one another as individuals, of humans with the dignity of life, was on display. And from there, further we sunk.
I spoke of gravity earlier. I think COVID-19 is a base to that. The daily weight, the daily stress, of an invisible opponent. Be that from financial concerns and job loss, to complications with child care and education, to health concerns and the loss of those dear, to the lack of social interactions- or perhaps the presence of social interactions, and the fear and pressure of judgments.
We all know it, and feel it- this Chinese finger trap which tightens and tightens the more that we fight it. The feeling that joy, when experienced, has a guilt to it, knowing how short it is in supply, how privileged we are to have it.
In September, the US COVID-19 death count had reached 200,000. We accelerated from there, and finished 2020 with over 300,000 deaths.
Along with those deaths, the amount of misinformation surrounding COVID-19 has created deep rifts in our respect for one another. The lines are drawn, between the "sheeple" who believe the "lies of the mainstream media" and are "against American values", and the "anti-maskers" who are "idiots", "anti-science" and know the "truth".
It has created yet another "us vs them" mentality, with clear visualizations of those groupings.
After the November US Elections, Time wrote "Polarization is Only Clear Winner of 2020 Election". At the time, PEW surveys showed that 9/10 Americans believed that victory by the other party would lead to "lasting harm".
And so we arrive at today.
The US Senate was scheduled to certify the 2020 election results, normally a formality after each state, and the electoral college, have already confirmed the results. A few Republican senators, likely in a bid to maintain the loyalty of Trump supporters, planned to challenge the election results as part of this session.
Meanwhile, Trump supporters from across the country gathered. Current US President Trump spoke to them and said he will "never concede". His audience then moved to storm the Capitol and were able to breach security.
The US Capitol has been overtaken by Trump loyalists.
It is a grave moment in our country's history. It is a scary moment.
I feel the heaviness of this division. I'm seeing the chasm. Seeing the paper tearing, but being so close to it, I can't tell quite yet if it's just a corner tearing off, or if it's right down the middle and nearly through into pieces.
I'm waiting to see what happens, feeling its significance. Working out if the lines can be undrawn. Reflecting on what else brought us here. Hoping, finally, that gravity has brought us to rock bottom, and that we cannot sink further.
Time will tell if that is just naive.
Comments
Post a Comment